Audio Visual Club bringing some tunes, films and other nerdy shite recommendations.
“We’re here! We CHEER! Get Over It”
There is a guilty pleasure of mine I must confess to, something I think that might be a pleasure for many of us who grew up with cult classic films like Step Up, Honey, Stick it, and Bring It On (to name but a few stars of this deep well of deliciousness).
Generally speaking, I am legit obsessed with all cheer, dance, and gymnastics-related films, TV shows, and culture. This obviously includes the Olympics however, that gorgeous world of gods and goddesses is not what I am here today to discuss. Today I look to the highly competitive, and truly often batshit crazy, phenomenon of cheerleading. Cheer is its own universe here in the States. It’s almost like a national identity in and of itself, and for the people who are in it, they are IN IT. They live, breathe, and alter the course of their lives, sometimes moving across the country, to belong to it. I. AM. HERE. FOR. IT. This sport is often regarded as being sexist, misogynistic, anti-feminist, sexualizing, and yet and yet and yet. It is a form of athleticism that demands an indelible mixture of dedication, pretty much lifelong training in gymnastics and dance, oodles and buckets of unceasing energy, a commitment to dolling yourself up/matching ‘the look’ and also asks the human body to destroy itself in order to succeed. What a fuckin’ rush eh? This…this is not just a sport. Especially because it holds as much makeup, drama, and secrets within its (tightly regulated by the National Cheer Association) walls as any Real Housewives or Love Island-type reality show. There is a global interest in these types of documentary-style stories that hit at the intersection of rags to riches, sports, hot bods, and cult-like tribalism. Netflix got the world looking at this sport in 2020 with Cheer and it has blown da fook up in good and bad ways. Seems like the world of cheer needed a shakeup.
IF you want drama just google Navarro Cheer and controversy oh boy you will drown in it.
Now we have even more of a peek into this tasty space of tight tushies with Netflix’s newest special America’s Sweethearts: Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders. Here is the spooling madness of my contradicting personal thoughts during my multiple-day binge of this show.
As I type this I am watching the coach of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleading (D.C.C) squad legitimately discuss whether the arch of one of the potential cheerleader’s eyebrows is enough of a consideration to keep her on the team or cut her. They say and I quote “Is that structural or bronzer?” I feel that deep within my core. This show has me careening down a path of internal self-reflection. Are the flaws I see pulsating from myself structural or simply bronzer? I, in my matrescence, feel so disembodied at times it’s almost laughable. My baby was born over a year ago and still, I haven’t found a home in my body. Perhaps it’s because I have rarely felt that way in my 30-plus years of life or perhaps it is the slippering marketing of the world telling me what my postpartum self should be both physically and in my identity. In any case, I feel seen and also confusingly aggravated at this whole process.
Side note, why are the men in the first round of judges not in any way dancers, trained coaches, or anything that would make sense to judge women dancing for team? Are they there to simply decide which women they think are hot? That one boot guy ogling these ladies and saying they don’t look in perfect shape? ehhhh sir?
The critiques from the judges, coaches, and trainers throughout the show focus on the itsy bitsy teeny weeny moments the average person would not even think of. Perhaps that is why they are so good because these coaches can design something absolutely perfect. They see past present and future while. calculating the degree of a cheerleader’s foot as it crosses her face during the kick line (see below)
At first, I liked them and now I am disappointed in them with a visceral ferocity. The coaches of the D.C.C have been discussing amongst themselves, with the woman who I think owns (?) the Cowboys company, about a rookie who is shorter than most of the girls. They consider cutting her because of her height stating that she appears (amongst 38 other women) to be that of a child running too gleefully after adult women. What in the bullshit??? This is brutal, it is petty, and it overlooks everything else she has done up to this point to earn her place on the team. This leads these women, in positions of power, to discuss potentially making an essential change to the application process by introducing a height requirement (I KID YOU NOT) for the D.C.C.
Imagine….if Simone Biles showed up to audition, all 4 ft 8 inches of her powerful self, and they turned the greatest gymnast in the world away because her height was too…childlike. Seems to me to be hypocritical for an organisation that stereotypes feminine sexuality into these narrow definitions of beauty as directed by the male gaze to court the opinion of public appeal. Then of course there is the darker side of organizations like this that profit off these cheerleaders who are underpaid and yet rake in billions for the company with their time and labour. I am so mad but boy do I LIVE for this shit. This stuff must be so incredibly intense on these women’s mental health that I can’t even handle it.
Watching the faces of the cheerleaders fall as they are called to stay back on cut night is heartbreaking. Why am I crying so hard? Perhaps because I have been in that place of shattered peace where you know no way forward and you are very publicly losing hope. There is just this big heart in these young women and also an admirable dedication. To see them crestfallen after getting so close…especially since many of them are not young people of privilege but often from lower-class backgrounds or have had adverse childhoods. Are we the same? Could I too be a cheerleader simply because of my heart and goddess-like physical capabilities?
So looking past the gossip and drama, it’s surprising to me that I am so obsessed with the world of cheerleading. A major valid criticism of the culture is that it is highly problematic. The focus on the body and ‘beauty’ encourages eating disorder behaviour. The obsession with perfection triggers mass mental health issues and generates a culture of injuring oneself to succeed. More than anything the whole industry is propped up on objectifying women to sell its concept.
What do I like about it? I think there is something within that culture that connects to a side of the feminine expression I have never been capable of embodying. A femininity that is strong yet soft and ‘girly’. I am not that lol. These women are athletes capable of far more athletic expression than most people I know and they are beautiful while they kick ass. They are also a team. They lift each other up (literally) and the sense of belonging is palpable. For the women who make it in the D.C.C the community they are stepping into literally makes them glow and shine, and they are so positive towards each other. It is very alluring. Is it all a ruse though?
and yet, and yet, and yet “the most defeating thing as a leader…even if I had a bad day or a horrible week there is no room for letting those emotions show.”-quote by Kelcey Wetterburg one of the group leaders.
It is such a contradiction. On the one hand, there is this incredible backbone of athleticism in cheer. These men and women are dancers, gymnasts, and generally beacons of positive energy that train and train and are examples of the kind of discipline we dream about. But there is a dark side to cheer. It is all-consuming, it perpetuates harm, it drives people to devestation, and it covers up scandals of sexual harassment, ageism, wage theft, and just general brainwashing so that the followers don’t see the cruelty.
I go to the final episode with both excitement for the fun, and performance side and a keen interest to see how they deal with what the Netflix series is rightfully bringing up. That the star-spangled hot pant clad hotties are part of a toxic and traumatic system.
Midnight wings officially clipped fellow Swifties
I cannot let this season come to a conclusion without acknowledging the most stressful Tuesday of my life which led to the greatest few months of my life which are now being curtained and forever shall remain known as THE GRAND DISAPPOINTMENT. You know the Tuesday of which I speak my fellow Swifties. Tuesday November 15th 2022. Forever it will go down in the annals of fandom as the day the ticket selling companies betrayed us and the world came to a halt as hundreds of thousands of us were left stranded in waiting room hell watching little dickhead computer men walk in place on unmoving orange lines for hours and hours and hours. We were commited and owed this and we were rewarded by being kicked out when we finally reached the top. Personally I nearly died and/or divorced my husband as I had forced him to wait nine hours in line to finally, barely get tickets when he bitched out at the last minute over choosing seats of all things (dude take whatever goddamn seat you can get!) and he lost his place in line. After nine hours of agony I was in and I was blessed with two beautiful nosebleed tickets at a reasonable price for the April show in Texas. Now however, I have had to make the most adult decision of my life and bow out of the attending the concert. Mainly for financial reasons as the cost to attend from where I currently live now would be incredibly irresponsible and set us back on our debt repayments.
I have been a sometimes undercover and most times not so undercover Taylor Swift fan since….well at least this photo was taken in 2013. TBH I think the one sided relationship began as far back as 2010. For a few years I hid this predictable, basic white girl trait of mine out of shame, a desire to not be a stereotype and to be cool I guess. Nowadays you will find me less concerned with being cool and more concerned with who I want to be when I grow up and how I can manage my adult imposter syndrome. (Am I the only over 30 year old that feels like a child play acting at being a grownup?)
Some of the most significant moments of my life have taken place with a backdrop of a Taylor Swift album soundtrack. Every time I play Red-Taylor’s Version obviously because the ten minute production of All Too Well’ is just such an excellent improvement on the original-I am immediately transported back to my very own Wet, Hot, American Summer in California at the ripe age of 21/22 when every facet of my life changed. My sense of smell and touch kick into gear and I can still clearly recall looking at the skyline of Vegas for the first time while arriving on a 4am Greyhound about to go see the Grand Canyon with the dulcet beats of State of Grace blasting in my ears. My bestie at the time Aisling is snuggling on my shoulder and I felt alive, young and free in a way I can’t describe in words. A way that is hard to generate now in my thirties where I have the usual burdens of bills, work and the responsibility of others to bear in the choices I make. I am on that bus and I am a version of myself who I regard with warmth and joy and it just makes me ache with gratitude at being alive.In my whole life there are a number of elements that invoke this awakeness and beautiful sense of nostalgia and visceral self-walking into the past and honestly Taylor’s music is one of them.
I have been playing Lavender Haze on repeat since it was released and I am absolutely delighted that it has been such a rousing success. Something about Taylor’s musical growth story really moves me. I understand there are haters and criticisms of her publicity stunts, marketing moves and public politics in the past do have some validity sure. Although I would counter that and say isn’t that something we should critically analyse in ALL celebrities? However, Taylor is a young woman who experienced a lot I won’t ever know about-fame, celebrity, wealth, paparazzi- and some I as a woman do know about-grooming, abusive men, manipulation, deep insecurity and a desire to be known, loved and to love well. I think that it’s cool to see her evolve both professionally and creatively. This album is Taylor at her most aggressive, she swears, she outright COMES for the men who have used her in the past *cough cough John Mayer. She takes all the beauty and rich lyric writing she harnessed on Folklore and Evermore and bonds it to catchy pop beats that is brilliantly executed in this Renaissance for Pop music that most people I feel can connect to and that is so much a part of the embodied human experience. She has gone through many transformations of herself which a vast majority of our generation can relate too. Her first music video and lead single released was Antihero and it swiftly (heh heh see what I did there) became the anthem of the moment. According to Taylor it’s none of her favourite songs she has ever written. It encapsulates the massive anxiety and general identity crises I think a lot of millennials are feeling right now as we begin to move into the role of the ‘elder generation’ to make room for this upcoming, next group of vibrant and inexplicable youths. Taylor is clever in her storytelling of what it means to be part of a culture of desperate self-definition coupled with the loss of security, safety and trust in the institutions of being human that served previous generations as bedrock. The album is fun, it’s silly and deep while serving up some fun layers and beats. The last few years of album production for her have been one massive success after another and her sound and skills have grown as she has. I know the tour will be fabulous as she has always been a stellar live performer and it’s will be fun to see what she does next.
I live on a tiny island in the ocean and because of that fact I had to wait A MONTH after the mainland fans for my special edition, pre-ordered Midnights Vinyl arrives. Obviously I am a dickhead for complaining about this fact because I live in a beautiful place but lord was it agonising. Now, that same locationary (is that a word?) fact is what is preventing me from experiencing something I have wanted to do for over a decade: see Lady Swift live. My heart is broken but I know that there are many fans in the same boat as I or who never even got tickets in the first place and that makes me feel betterish. Sometimes we have to hold out hope that there is goodness in the face of disappointment and what seems devastating now will one day reflect back as a choice that allowed for space for other positives and sweet things to enter into our days. That’s what I tell myself every time I feel inordinately sad about the whole thing. I am grateful to have music and have the ability to listen to it in such myriad beautiful ways. There is something to be said for the freedom of caring not for what people think of your personal music choices and embracing the status of ‘screaming fan’. Sometimes I feel I am regressing to a more simplified version of myself, maybe that’s what it means to lean into the human experience. As Taylor writes, “I have this thing where I get older, but just never wiser”. Maybe that’s ok loves, after all life is so short and sweet. As Taylor concludes on the 3AM edition of Midnights the self-doubt, mistrust, pain and soul questioning is all part of parcel of trying to figure this shit out. At least that’s how I feel when drunk dancing to this album at night with my husband of seven years as we try to start life over again with nothing except reconciling with the grief of losing a home, unresolved childhood trauma and a completely open door into an unknown and massive life.
Get pumped to get outta bed you sexy thing!
Happy Monday peepsicles I am feeling pumped today for some reason. I think cause I got a run in at dawn (WTF) and saw the sun rise and I am like feeling all the gratitude vibes in ma limbs. Also my period just ended literally yesterday so I think hormones is playing a role too.
SO let’s do a quick little music post to get the week going. I was trying to think of what theme I want for this next collection. I feel like my music tastes are all over the shop and I dread that question “what kind of music do you listen to?” cause my response of “well I like to listen to a lot of different types of music” is usually met with a “oh you are one of THOSE people who have no depth or taste” eye roll type moments and it sucks you know. How mean spirited, why ask a question if you don’t hear the answer you want? Usually people ask that question (or most questions really) because they just want to talk about the music THEY like and themselves and it’s like why is everyone so shit at conversation?
Anyways I digress <— sorry but is this like gonna be my slogan I feel like I am digressing constantly?
Back to the songskies. Right so, music to get you up and accompany you while moving in any direction just to help the heavy sleep shake off your bones and embolden you to workout or to work your way to the coffee machine and drink that sweet, poop brewing juice that makes you feel human. All things are good.
Ahhh pop music you know I actually like good pop music. I HATE bad pop music. One day maybe I’ll write about what is and isn’t true pop and why it’s actually a great and necessary genre. Now this is an oldie but a goodie. A frequently played on my iTunes song, Ryn was really big right around 2013 to 2016 ish, I think, when I was leaving college, doing lots of traveling and discovering myself and her music is associated with some of my sweetest memories of that special youthful time. I just love the build in this and her vocals which have a nice low tone and break to them. Sadly no music video I could find but arn’t the lyrics just darling? Oh they really capture that spontaneity of summer in your early 20s and the freedom to figure out who you are without the hoopla of responsibility and bills. I remember feeling like pure light sometimes right around being the age of 22/23 and I wasn’t yet aware of the shadow of things. The world was untouchable and I just wanted to BE love, this song takes me right back to that.
Ok, can I have my cool card back? This song is fucking epic seriously, Tobe and his wife FAT are such legends that now even Beyoncé is appropriating their aesthetic. (Not a Bey fan over here I am afraid sorry). Watch this video then watch Beyoncé’s Oscars 2022 performance, you will see what I mean. This song is brilliant, in fact everything The Originals put out is both a visual and audible delight. Lyrically it is profound and emotional and when FAT comes in the hype is next level. I love that they released this during the midst of the pandemic and I think the big family energy is deadly. These guys are making something special, I recommend reading up on them and all the brilliant stuff they do.
3.) Higher Love - Kygo and Whitney Houston
This video has me drooling no shame here I mean it has everything. Dream sequences, hot people working out in leotards, vintage vibes, a love story, 80’s booty, dancing. I feel big GLOW (Gorgeaus* Ladies of Wrestling) mixed with Dirty Dancing feels from this. Also this remix honestly what a success. I mean the OG Whitney with this song is a mood booster in and of itself but I like what Kygo does with it. He doesn’t cover up her voice or overpower it, he centers it which mmmm if you need a frequency boost this is it. I love this beat for running, weight lifting, walking or the most intense exercise of them all-MOPPING. This is ultimate mopping song. Just try it out and see, I always find my body naturally trying to dance like the video hotties so maybe you will to.
Alright peace out party people, enjoy this lovely week of living or maybe not so lovely. Remember every day ends and the sun always sets so there is always tomorrow.
*Also how in da fuc do you spell ‘gorgeaus’? I have never learned this word or the word ‘definetaly’ surely I am not alone in this.
Joyful free dance dance party baby
As I play around with this website and figure out how to share stuff without it trying to be ‘content-y’ or ‘influencer-ish’ or ‘hip tok’ I am going to be using a lot of awkward titles, experimenting with posts and generally just writing random tings so bear with me.
This is a fun idea I came up with while browsing YouTube for some songs to lift me while I was feeling low. Fuck it…isn’t it just so freeing to let go and dance and feel a swooping and upbeat song through every part of yourself? I know I love discovering new tuneskies that take me out of my head and ease my anxious or restless state. Bonus if they have unique and captivating videos. So I think I will share a few recommendations of songs that made me lose all composure, adult-y poise and control and let me embody stomp stomp giggle fall down feels. I am limiting it to three for the time being and we will see maybe next week will bring some more. Maybe we will even start to incorporate other good listening things like podcasts etc we shall see. Since my hairy human companion and I have limited television in our lives to almost naught we have been filling our downtime with other audio and visual joys. That my friends is why I added this page-the Audio Visual Club. Now over to the real creatives:
Hozier - Almost (Sweet Music)
Released on his 2019 Wasteland, Baby! album this song is just a pure musical celebration. The video features lots of dancing and a fun vibe. Of note this video has a young and beautiful artist named Cameron Boyce who died tragically young from illness a few years ago. I felt a lot of feelings watching this especially because Hozier is from Ireland and lives near my childhood home. He is a big advocate for music and the essential nature of it in our lives, I am here for that.Jon Batiste - I NEED YOU
Uh I absolutely COULD NOT make a post like this and not feature a Jon Batiste song. This man embodies 100% the concept I am trying to get across here. Total, iridescent joy, fun and silly goofy brilliance. This is from his 2021 album We Are. This video is one of my favourites of all time. Watch it all. I love the concept, the dancing, the timelessness and the outfits.Florence and the Machine-Free
Obviously I gotta feature a female artist because female vocalists just mean so much to me. Look how could I NOT choose this song. First of all it’s a total banger, secondly it has a brilliant message and thirdly BILL FUCKING NIGHY plays Welch’s anxiety/shadow self?!?! I mean this is just making all my spidey senses tingle. This song is from Florence and The Machine’s most recent album Dance Fever released in 2022 which is probably one of the best albums they have ever made and one of my top ten of all time.
Ok folks that’s all for today. I gotta save some more of the good stuff for next time. See you around nerds.