Mid-month slump recommendations
Just to say, I do not get to shower and I do not have friends but I ASPIRE to both those things so it’s ok if that is also you. I am looking at you mamas.
Starting us off right with a sweet little note of some good, daily things that seem inconsequential but can actually fill our tired tanks. I am more tired than I have been in a long time and it’s a dreich tired that seeps into me and feels hard to shake. Dreich is a beautiful Scottish word I came upon recently which means ‘bleak, dull, gloomy, dread’ and is often invoked when describing, well, the weather which can indeed be gloomy in those parts. I like it because I am a weirdo who loves gloomy weather. With full understanding that this can be pedantic nonsense that people tell themselves in order to derive meaning from what can feel like a meaningless existence, I find that in order to keep lifting my head off the pillow each day I need to settle my brain on acknowledging both realities. For me, gratitude practices can often feel a little like positivity gaslighting. I get that it is so essential to recognise the good that we have and bring into consciousness an honesty about the beautiful parts of our lives. Especially as a tool to fortify ourselves in the face of adversity. However, when you are struggling to keep your head above the rising tides of our challenging times and it feels like you are trapped in a super set of tidal waves individually designed to pull the threadbare rug from under your bloodied bare feet, writing down three things you are grateful for each day without acknowledging the fact that you barely even made it to the end of the day just feels paper thin. I am struggling at the moment with swinging between feelings of total emotional disassociation and rage. It is a lot. My life here in America is isolating and the hardship is harder than I could ever have imagined. This is true and it is also true that there will not likely be a let up in suffering for a long time. It is also true that I get to drink a lovely cup of steaming hot coffee every morning that I look forward to more than I could ever have believed. I have the physical capacity to go outside my door and walk with my teacup human and my dogs if I choose and we can take our time, breath in clean air, feel a stretch in the ole legs and wave at the garbage truck drivers who, to our delight, the horn and make the truck dance for us every time. I am grateful that I get to hold my little one as she falls asleep being the last thing she sees at night and the first word she says every morning, ‘mama’. How could I have ever known how completely that one little word shatters me and fills me at the same time. There are others who don’t have these small mercies. I am fully grateful and I am wholly frustrated at the muck of it all too. I hope, dear readers, you come away knowing it is ok to feel both.
Reads
How to build a village by Rosie Spinks, What Do We Do Now That We Are Here. Goodness it’s been said by more than a few people that making friends as an adult is not easy or fun or possible (??) at least that is how I feel. I thought this was a good challenge to change the way we approach, pursue and define friendship by such narrow terms as what we have known in a different iteration of ourselves.
Ah with all the crap-ola of American governmental decisions, appointings, legislative stuff and life harming actions it’s hard to think that there is any ideas left to sow good in this country. I thought this was a great article with a practical and essential need faced by the current populace that if put in place could set a precedent with AI for the next few years. The executive order Trump should sign: AI watermarks by Erik Hoel, the Intrinsic Perspective. I learned a lot from this article and as someone who is quite frankly a little frightened by the fact that I cannot trust what I see with my eyes, hear with my ears and read with my brains online to not be AI produced I like the idea put forth.
Bants
In the spirit of humour in the darkness:
I am here to say this is me and my husband knows this of me well enough to ask “Do you want to go for a run?” when hurricane Ned starts a-brewing in our house.
This IS my child. I see no difference.
I love this peculiarity of a spectacle. The bestowing of god like powers of divination unto a rodent and holding a festival in it’s honour each year. This is the America I can get behind.
Ok that’s all the memes I got for now. My spirits were indeed lifted giggling at these this week. Honestly it’s one reason it is so DAMN hard to quit social media.
Eats
I signed myself up again to make food for my mommy group that I attend. You know, in a vain attempt to win these women over to my weirdo nerdy pants camp of friendship away from their cool SoCal Yoga mom vibes through their tummies.
CURSE YOU PAST NED
As if I needed more things to do last week. (I did not I needed less).
Anyways, I made a fabulous breakfast casserole that was delicious and gobbled up and even my child has chowed down on it’s veggie laden goodness so I am well pleased.
I used feta (rennet free) instead of ricotta because what the heck that is such an expensive cheese but honestly any cheese will do or even omit if you don’t like cheese. Also for veggies I threw in some zucchini (courgette) I had going old in the fridge and I don’t know I think some arugula (rocket) that was wilty on top. I am a big fan of using almost gone off bottom-of-the-fridge veggies in cooking. If they aren’t mouldy they still have something to give I say.